Month: April 2022

“Are you gonna kiss me or not?  Are we gonna do this or what?  (Thompson Square)

Once upon a time on my Facebook page I posted the question “Who gives you or gave you the best kiss ever?”  Some talked up their spouses, some recalled first kiss experiences and other encounters as well.  I noted my “Greatest kiss” happened when I was 22 and that’s all I said.  Oh, what the hell, I’ll share a little more on that happening.

This was back when I was on the air at Elmhurst College’s radio station, WRSE, 88.7 on your FM dial where I had a number of faithful listeners.  So, while emceeing a local band’s concert, I met radio fan Vicky.  She was a couple years younger than I and we did the requisite “I love your show”, “Well thanks for listening Vicky” type of chat.  As we talked about music, I took the opportunity to invite her to an upcoming Genesis concert that I had tickets for and she accepted.

The show was a good one and we had fun that night. Yet when I drove her home, I didn’t attempt a good night kiss.  More often than not I would go for the night ending lip lock but this situation didn’t feel right, not yet at least. 

Fast forward a couple of Saturday nights. I was hosting my six to 9 pm show.  Vicky called me on the request line.  She invited me to her house for a small party she was having with friends and her older sister while their parents were out of town.  Why not?  Right?  After getting off the air I came over. We had a few beers and watched some concert on M-TV.  It was just a nice easy time with some fellow music fans, no big deal.

After the TV concert, it was late and I was getting ready to put on my coat and leave.  It was just Vicky, her older sister and me talking in the kitchen.  Then I politely asked her sister if I could have a couple minutes alone with Vicky. Thankfully, big sis quickly obliged and now I was full on ready for a move.  By the way, the ‘couple minutes alone’ request is not an easy play to make!  It’s like doing the 7-10 split in bowling or trying an onside kick in football and the kicking team recovering the ball.  But I made this play flawlessly.

I walked closer to this lovely blonde thanking her for inviting me over as I reached to hold her hand.  Vicky was fine with my gesture but noted she wasn’t sure I was romantically interested in her since I didn’t go for a kiss after the Genesis concert.  I made some lame ‘Oh, I didn’t want to rush up on things’ excuse and she smiled.  With that I went all in to kiss her.  

And she was all in too.

Whoa! Wow!  And holy s***! That first smooch lasted about a minute and in my young love life I’d never been smacked like that.  Just the perfect touch, smell, taste, everything. Electric! To quote Prince in the song “Raspberry Beret”, “I could tell when she kissed me, she knew how to get her kicks.”  A snug embrace and a couple more, deep kisses followed and then it was time for me to go.  

I drove home that night thinking, “Man, that was special!” I mean my head was spinning and it wasn’t from having too many beers.

So, you’re probably wondering what became of that potential relationship.  Not much.   Why?  My fault.  There were a couple more times when Vicky called me asking to get together and I honestly had other plans going on and couldn’t make it to see her.  

After the second time turning this lady’s invite down, I felt like a schmuck and figured she’ll probably moved on and thinks I’m a knucklehead.  You can either fish or cut the line and I cut the line.

Still, ever since then, I’ve compared any romantic kiss with a woman to the ones Vicky gave me and not one has matched up.  There’ve been some close calls but still, not up to what she offered me.

I think my memory of those kitchen kisses could best be summed up by the re-working of the Crystals song “Then He Kissed Me” that Bruce Springsteen sometimes sings in concert.

“She kissed me in a way I’d never been kissed before, she kissed me in a way I want to be kissed forever more.” 

Here’s Springsteen singing “Then She Kissed Me.”

Next blog- Songs for Secretaries.

Surfing through YouTube the other day I came across an old song that brought a sly smile to my face.  It took me back to a specific memory.  The song was Sammy Johns’ 1975 top 5 hit “Chevy Van.” 

“Cuz like a princess she was laying there, moonlight dancing off her hair, she woke up and took me by the hand, she’s gonna love me in my Chevy van and that’s alright with me.”

In Chicago and the outlying suburbs, you could not tune into 890 AM WLS or AM 1000 WCFL without hearing this tale of a guy in a van who picks up a lady hitchhiker. They end up dancing the dirty hula in said van before he drops her off the next day for the walk of shame in bare feet on a dirt road main street. 

However, my memory is from two years AFTER this song was a radio hit.  I take you to a warm summer night at the Ski Hi Twin Drive-In Theater on Route 53 in Addison, Illinois.  I was with four high school buddies and we saw a double feature that night; I think the first flick was “Kentucky Fried Movie” and for sure the second was the low budget flick “The Van.”  It was about a dorky guy who cruised around in his new van trying in vain to score with women.  I won’t spoil any more of the plot in case you want to check out this cinematic classic.  The song “Chevy Van” was prominently featured in the movie and this was at the back end of the whole late 70’s ‘Get a customized van all tricked out’ craze.

At the drive-in, we were in Ed Bergstrasser’s parents’ AMC Pacer.  Remember those cars with the funny wide back end to them?  Ed and I were in the front seats, Jim Briegel and Will Costello in the back seat and Mark Fredriksen was in the hatch in the back.  Besides munching on popcorn, we had a decent load of beers in a cooler which we guzzled through the night.

After draining several Old Styles, Fredriksen had to take a pee and we wouldn’t let him out of the back hatch. He was stuck there and had to go.  Mark, ever the resourceful type, took one of the empty popcorn containers and gave it a good fill.  We thought he was bluffing, until the unmistakable sound of a urine stream filling up a popcorn tub was heard.  We laughed our asses off and then Ed let Mark out to dump the pee out on the gravel road.

Sometime before the end of “The Van,” I ended up sitting in the back hatch and that’s when the trouble started.  As the cars at the outdoor theater filed out at night’s end, Ed, hopefully less buzzed than the rest of us, made his way into the slow bumper to bumper traffic going south on Rt. 53 as we headed to North Avenue.

Thanks to the beers loosening my inhibitions, I thought with this wide back window, why not moon the car behind us?  Not that any of my pals discouraged me, just the opposite.  ‘Yeah, drop your shorts and show something.’  So, I did just that.

We laughed when the car I mooned honked their horn loudly as we all waited at a stoplight.  However, those happened to be honks of anger.  This became apparent when a very large and tough looking man in a black T-shirt and jeans came barreling out of his car to yell at us.  This offended dude actually looked like ‘Dugan’ who was the tough guy character in “The Van.”  The guy was pissed off because his girlfriend was with him and he didn’t appreciate me showing off my vertical smile to her. 

The guy pounded on the roof of Ed’s parent’s car and wanted us to get out so he could pound on us.  Our doors were locked and Ed tried to make like ‘Hey I didn’t tell him to moon you, be cool!’  But this guy was still ticked off; so ticked that he kneed the driver’s side door and put a dent in it!  Fortunately, the red light turned green and Ed was able to speed off from our mad as hell antagonist.  Luckily this door pounding man didn’t follow after us and we were home free.

 We wondered how Ed was going to explain to his folks the dent in the driver’s side door but it turns out the dent just bounced out and wasn’t noticeable.  My buddies and I saw lots of movies at that Drive-in but never had quite that kind of adventure again.  The 53 Ski Hi Twin Drive-in has been gone for years, and I haven’t dropped my pants for strangers in a long time. 

Now let’s take another spin in a “Chevy Van.”  Country star Sammy Kershaw did a good cover of the song, but thanks to this musical memory, we need to hear the original.

NEXT BLOG- My Best Kiss Ever.

Back in my school days I sometimes wondered what my teachers did during their vacations.  Be it the Christmas, Spring or Summer breaks.  Sometimes a teacher might’ve shared about a warm weather trip a ball game or home project that they worked on but that was rare.  So, here’s a rundown of what I was up to for my break from 3pm on 3/25 thru 4/3.

*I re-upped my swim Elmhurst Park District pool pass for this summer.  We’re less than two months away from East End Pool opening and I can’t wait to see my ‘Summer Family’ again.

*I went to the huge and fun packed wedding reception of my pal Phil’s daughter Amanda.  Lots of laughs, fantastic eats, drinks and love was in the air!

*I finally saw “The Batman” which I liked.  Much darker than any other Batman film and as quick as the almost 3 hours went by, the producers could’ve easily knocked half an hour off this one.

*The NCAA Men’s basketball tournament was a great watch and I caught plenty of games and excitement.

*For the first time in decades, I skipped watching the Oscars live but yes, like everyone else in the world, I got caught up in the Will Smith/Chris Rock mess.  Will, you screwed up big time and good luck getting your career back on track!

*On HBO I watched both episodes of the documentary “Phoenix Rising” which covers the story of actress Evan Rachel Wood and her complicated and dangerous relationship with shock rocker Marilyn Manson.  I believe Ms. Wood and her claims 100%.  Even if just half of what she presented were true, Marilyn Manson is a sick and twisted freak.

*Also on HBO, the latest edition of “On the Record with Bob Costas” brought out an in-depth interview with pitching ace Max Scherzer along with a funny and poignant visit with Bill Crystal.  All this plus a good round table discussion on race in collegiate basketball and other current events issues in sports.  Bob Costas remains a smart. insightful and on target interviewer.

*Netflix presented a good drama movie titled “Windfall.”  Jason Segal plays a calm yet scary hostage taker.  What takes place in the film was hard to predict and fun to see.

*Thanks to its Best Picture win at the Oscars, “CODA” finally made it to the local theaters (I don’t have Apple TV) and I loved this film.  A touching and often times funny look at a young girl who is the only non-deaf person in her family.  When I used to substitute teach, I did a few turns in hearing loss classes and this movie brought back fond memories of those days with some fine young students.

* I didn’t just watch TV all day. I saw a feature on and quickly ordered and read the new book “Leave the Gun, Take the Cannoli” written by Mark Seal.  This four hundred plus page book chronicles all the stories and details behind the writing and making of “The Godfather.”  Real detailed stuff in this tome.

*Around the house I took care of some various chores.  I switched out my glass front porch door window for the screen window.  I also hit the hardware store to stock up on furnace filters and light bulbs along with household cleaning products.

*Two of my closets got purged of old ratty clothes and I straightened out my dresser drawers while dumping out more unworn junk.

*I also got in some spring cleaning of my house. Two months of neglect added up so I dusted, scrubbed, vacuumed and cleaned everything from top to bottom.  Later this spring I’ll hire a maid service to give the house one of those semi-annual run throughs that make everything sparkle like my place was brand new.

*Finally, I met with a concrete contractor about some work that needs to be done on my front walk and stoop.  His official estimate is fair and doable.

*Other than all this, I relaxed.  It was a relief that for 10 days I was not on a specific clock to do things.  I did stuff when I was ready to do them. (Save for the wedding reception, which was a blast)

Returning to school, we have just over 7 weeks left in the 4^th grading period and then 20 days of summer school.  Then it’s Summer Break time and there’s plenty to look forward to when that happens.

NEXT BLOG- Memories of the song “Chevy Van.”